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A Man who Goes to sea for pleasure would go to Hell for a past-time...
Sailors ought never to go to church. They ought to go to hell, where it is much more comfortable. Between the innocence of infancy and The recklessness of adultery comes that unique Specimen of humanity known as a seaman Seamen can be found in bars, in arguments In bed, in debt and intoxicated. They are tall, short, fat, thin, dark, fair but never normal. They dislike ships food, chief engineers, writing letters Sailing on Saturdays and dry ships. They like receiving mail, paying off day, nude pin ups, Sympathy, complaining and beer. A seamans secret ambition is to change positions With the owner for just one trip, to own a brewery And to be loved by everyone in the world. A seaman is a Sir Galahad in a Japenese brothel, A pyschiatrist with Readers Digest on the table, Don Quixote with a discharge book, The saviour of mankind with his back teeth awash, Valentino with a fiver in his back pocket and Democracy personified in a red Chinese prison cell. No one is subject to so much abuse, wrongly accused, So often misunderstood by so many as a seaman. He has the patience of Job, the honesty of a fool, And the heaven sent ability to laugh at himself. When he returns home from a long voyage No one else but a seaman can create such an atmosphere Of suspense and longing as he walks through the door With the magic words on his lips, HAVE YOU GOT THE ALE IN THEN !!
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